Resolving Interpersonal Conflict

Interpersonal conflict is a situation in which one or both parties in a relationship are experiencing difficulty in communicating with each other. This arises due to the different needs, goals or styles. Conflict occurs at all levels of interactions – at work (the infamous ‘office politics’), among friends, within families and of course, between you and your partner. Conflict can both be destructive and productive, depending on the way you choose to resolve it. Choosing the wrong technique will destroy a relationship whereas the right one will lead to deeper understanding, mutual respect and closeness. There are many ways to confront a conflict: openly, ignore it, suppress it or withdraw from the situation.

I came across this scenario when I was watching a show on cable television.

Scenario:

A is the founder of a listed company. As it is a family business, A hopes that his only son, B, will be able to inherit the company and be his successor. However, B aspires to be a hairstylist, an occupation his dad thinks that the future is bleak. A thinks that only by working in a big firm will his son be successful.

B continued to work under A but no matter how many chances A gave him to perform, he was unable to live up to A’s expectations. B had tried his utmost best but A thinks that he was not being serious and taking pride in his work. B had tried ways and means to put it across to him that he was just not interested in business but to no avail.

One day A asked B to do up a proposal involving a big client of the company and gave him a day’s grace. This was a great chance to let B prove himself to the company. Despite it being an opportunity to shine, B was not at all happy. He felt that he was being tortured, having to face piles of documents to analyse. The day came for him to hand in the proposal to his dad.

B: “Dad, I know it’s disappointing but I tried my best. I know you are disappointed in me.”

A: “Go back and redo this proposal. I will give you 3 days’ grace.”

B: “But, no matter how long you give me, I can only come up with this!”

A: “If you don’t know how to write, you can ask me!”

B: “I am not business savvy! My interests are not in business! No matter how hard I try, I will not be able to perform! Why don’t you let me do something I like?!”

A does not agree with his son and thus a fight between son and dad broke out, straining their relationship.

What could A and B have done in order to prevent this conflict?

Just for laughs =)

Why effective communication is important to me

To me, effective communication is crucial at every stage of our life. Be it when you are just a baby making ‘baby noises’ to get your demands answered, or when you have just started schooling and having to make new friends, having to face the whole class to give a presentation, and not to mention, when you advance into the working world. However, this essential skill does not come easily to many people, and it is a skill that requires practice. I am, sadly, such a person with this lack of skill.

I am a person who is stronger in the written aspect of communication rather than the oral, which is unfortunately, also essential and critical when I advance into the working world in a few months time. Excellent communication skills are, undoubtedly, the golden criteria that employers look for. It is time I do something about it, which is why I considered taking this module.=P

Whenever the focus of attention is on me speaking, I am always unable to express my thoughts clearly and coherently. For example, when I am trying to relate a story to my friends, even though I have the gist of the story and how it goes in my head, I often find myself blabbering the story in all the wrong sequences, leaving them with a big question mark in their head and a ‘huh?’ from their mouth.

Many unwanted quarrels can and would be prevented if thoughts are effectively relayed across. I believe there are some out there who, like me, have experienced this: family quarrels. We all can seem to communicate perfectly well to our friends, getting out intended message across, and getting the response we want. However when it comes to family, there always seem to be a communication breakdown somewhere, somehow. Effective communication starts with understanding what the message is, knowing the target audience and how they will perceive the message and to weigh the circumstances surrounding communication such as situational context. Somehow, in the course of the quarrel, all these seem to fail. We fail to understand how the other will perceive the message and to weigh the circumstances (which probably result in a more escalated quarrel), and fail to send a clear, organised, error-free message. I believe none of us wants to quarrel, needless to say with your kin. They are the closest and the dearest to you and quarrelling with them will only bring sorrows and strained relationships. By being able to communicate effectively, we can minimize the number of miscommunications and quarrels, and of course improve family relationships, with all those unwanted quarrels to hurt it.

As I have found in this module, organisation is important as it is supposed to create a pattern for the audience, allowing them to grasp the whole picture clearly and focus on the details, without struggling to understand how you go from one point to another. Failure to understand how the target audience perceive the message will lead to the intended message getting distorted and eventually communication breakdown. Effective communication is only successful if both the sender and receiver understand the same information

Hopefully, by the end of this module, I will be able to improve on my communications skills to get my message across effectively to prevent anymore strained relationships as a result of miscommunication and to be able to use it to climb up the corporate ladder in the future (coupled with other deciding factors of course)

First Time!!

helloo!! =)